Looking in the Mirror,

[Michelle McClellan]

When I came up with the idea of adopting a puppy I had in my head the idea that I would raise this puppy to be my perfect dog. I was listening to the dog whisperer books and I was prepared I was going to do his formula and mold myself the perfect dog. I started out really well I made sure he never had an accident in his crate running home every two hours from work to let him out and I walked him constantly. I was constantly training trying to mold this puppy into the dog I dreamed of. The problem with this high intensity training I got so caught up in the dog he would be I wasn't enjoying the dog I had. So I stressed over everything and worried constantly for the first month and half and then I hit a wall where I couldn't do it any more I was drained dry. So then I fixated on fixing a yard secure enough that he could be out there with out me needing to worry, the truth was I wanted some place to stick him so I didn't have to deal with him. I had gone to two extremes constantly worrying about the dog and then resenting his presence in my life.

I actually broke down on several occasions crying because of how much stress I was putting on myself and on my dog. My best friend and roommate pointed out that since I had gotten him I actually got up in the mornings and stuck to a schedule I was less all over the place and more centered in the present. My mom pushed me to see that he was just a puppy and would have good days and not as good of days. Through this internal struggle I finally reached a point where my dog stopped just being a dog and became truly my pet Watson. I finally remembered all the things I loved about having him around and so I think I found the middle ground a place where we train for short spurt and play for as long as we can.

I have actually grown to where I enjoy setting up play dates for him and finding new places to take him and let him get new experiences. I believe he came into my life to challenge me to stay ground in the present and not live so much the someday.